Stree Vashya

• Taking up a few case studies where husband is spiritual and wife is not and how to deal with it.
• These are the issues troubling almost many families and individuals ......WHAT is the probable reason for such developments ? why more and more families are facing these issues ? ANY ANALYSIS ....
• My father used to tell one should not become SIMPLEX circuits .... there should be duplex communication
• RKG " how many times [uptil now ] your wife has disagreed with you [ on various aspects ] .. DO you everytime think [ whenever she disagrees ] that IF only HOROSCOPE would have matched better ????
• WIFE is NASTIK " is a overstatement " there is disparity in LEVELS of ASTIKYa ... dont you feel ...
• RUNANUBANDHA definitely .. horoscope is the RUNA
• DOES wife has an IDEOLOGY ? DO women have ideology is still better querry ? {technically no } { they have only one ideology in good times HIS ideology is wonderful i am awed .... in bad times I dont know why i have to listen to only his ideology } there is no other ideology its always husband centric
• Neela Shaadi ka doosra naam hi PARESHAANi hai ..
• YEH dekho husband ka naam paresh hai
• 95% okay
• DO not exist means ther is nO couple [ woh jo do dabbo ko jodte hai na railway lingo mein couple dalo bolte ]
• The actual problem is WHEN a person gets spiritual .. he forgets HE has taken 30 40 50 years to come to this understanding .. HE immediately wants others to become like him ... from the day he has started ..
• NEELA is thred ko gaur se padhna tumhari problem solve ho jayegi
• What happens when someone starts his spiritual journey .. THER is a feeling I am improving .. I am better , I am not sining ... TILL here it is fine .. BUT then another thought sinks in ... THE poeople around me are siners , they are not improving , they are becoming less .... oh my spouse is LESS .. HOW nice if she would have been better ? PARESHAANI chalu ... [ bhai agar tunko 30 saal lage janne mein saamne wale ko 40 bhi lag sakte hain ,,, patience kyun nahi hai ? ]
• BUt when one wants to accelerate others progress [ like a fast forward button ] then it will create problems ... the likes and dislikes creeps in .. the distance get more ... here one must know ART OF CHILLING and not CHILLAING
• HAinji kal tak to kanda lasun chaba chaba ke khate the .. AAJ guruji ne kya patti padhayi .. HUM sab kanda chodde .. yeh kya baat hui ..
• This problem is very grave where MADI exists in families ... People get hyper sensitive [ especially there is no gyaana but eagerness to be spiritual is more .. for women > 60 , they want young daughter in law just be like them from day one thats it /// ]
• recently one girl got married into Um family [ boy a s/w engineer and girl very good looking modern outlook but also abiding ] .. now in a function .. both father in law and mother in law [ who had just retired an taken up spirituality ] insisted the newly wed bride wear a KACHCHI and come to function ... [ religious function aim is they want to make a point look our DIL is under our control ] ... but Girl does not know even to wear a saree .. so she went to beauty parlour and got a good make up .. and then in beauty parlour got a the KAchchi helped by the parlour maid .. and staright came into function in temple ... NOW twhat went amiss was .. ordinary saree when worn as kachee .. exposes , ankles thighs and lower waist very badly .. [ killing the evry purpose of the kachchi ] the beautiful very fair 20's girl with all vitals at display became a star attraction at the function .. and everyone was embarassed .. but FAther in law and mil felt everyone is praising them girl felt she is looking fabulous .. but husband was at odds .. he repeatedly asked her to sit by her side .. she refused to sit .. she wanted to stand and that too aisde ... and kept on telling [ i have done all this from beauty parlour .. let it show up ] .. slowly all unmariied boys ganged around her .. making husband even more miserable ... ... and then girls parents came and in came her sister .. she immdiately covered her from back and gave hera shawl .. which she constantly refused .. finally a arcahka reprimanded ... THIS is not the wya to come to temple ... THEN the father in law started arguing isnt KACHCHI compulsory ?
• So practise of spirituality should not overrule society obligations ...
• dont we sin at all .. if a family was regularly going out and suddenly ifthe spiritual master puts a blanket ban on the outing .. will THAT work ?
• VIJU shaadi ke baad hum yehi question tumse poochenge ..
• KK ka shaadi ho gaya aur humko pata bhi nahi ?
• first COmmon sense should prevail .. second tolerance towards others progress in spirituality ...[ but that does not mean one mjust try blind eye to all and everyone ] so it all boils down to how to nudge others into spirituality without being pushy
• Some times [ this is for all non married ] .... in josh some people express as if they have reached heights of spirituality and make their parents or bhiayya bhabhi dance to thgeir craziness ... I remember one case where a guy [post gradauate ] suddenly became very spiritual and use to make coments and over reaction at all memebers ,, especially when he sits for pooja he would inspect each vessel [ sllver ] whethere there is even a speck of wetness .. with lens and if he finds any he would shout at top of his vocals on elders " dont you ll know how to give vesels for pooja " .... and in anger he would get it all wiped again and continue ... The same person after marraige could not even command his wife to give him a dress or breakfast .. he would do everything all by himself .. and all the while everyone would laugh at him ...
• and everytime he would adjust with all kinds of impurity ...
• KK you said "first one should practise then make others do same esp in family... this is my case sir.." that defys bachelor status
• we are studying case study's to see how things make big difference with time !1
• when concept of madi suchi asuchi is not known , but the evry doing of it or rather exhibition of the same becomes paramount in thinking that spirituality is being practised .. MANY MANY problems crop in
• how can you enforce on your mOM and DAD , That is again problamatic
• Padmini Srivatsa wing ke under toh agayi bechara husband aaj tak ud nahi paraha hai
• in my childhod days there were exclusive bramhin streets , there were no taps inside house .. street corner there would be one borewell and older women [ the saas gang ] would get up at 4 am and take bath in single white cloth wrapped just to cover modesty ... and get back to home and do their pooja .. after day break ... daughter in laws would queue up to fill the tank in the house so that all male members would take bath and do pooja .... IF by any chance anyone guest would come at ealy mornings by train he woudl faint looking at a white saree clad women with hair unkempt wet alone at street corner .... [ bhooooooot ] .... then funy part would be when at 5 all vegetable vendors [women lower caste] would balance their tomatoe baslets on head .. and cross through the street .. and these wet women would be worried IF SHE TOUCHES oh again a bath // and in the luka chupi /// someone would collide .... FUNNY part would despite ahving got all tomatoes crushed , the vendor would apologise .. and get a mouthful
• So after having seen various cases ... it is advised .. that we go slow on others progress .. be judgemental but not enforce issues .. slow brainwashing is must ....
• vegetables hamesha shuddha hote hain .. aur bechne kharidte kaam karte samay touch ka dosh nahi hota .... PARASHAR vachan
• SO the root of problem is two what are they ? one > attachment to once own kith and kin and owing to which one wants them to progress "arey yeh meri tarah bigad gaya toh , ise toh main sudharun mere toh is umra mein kuch nahi hua , iska main udhddhar kaise karun .... [ jab khudka udhdhar hi nahi hua toh doosre ka kaise hoga ] .... two> acharan MADA .. I am doing it .. I am special and i have right to direct others .. if I can do IT why YOU DONT DO IT ? infact YOU must do it else you are inferior .. I CANT see youb inferiror .. arey MERE BETE HO TUM .. MERI biwi aise kkaise ..
• the street would be just two feet wide /. and gutter on both sides .... the most hilarious thing would be when a donkey would get in and stand just perpendicular to the road blocking it ... and then a sajjan would come and say ' ele katte nadi akade " " katte ninage helodyu .. nadi hush hush .." katte
• then there would be competition amomng aed woman in an afternoon talk as to who is most best in madi ... and youngsters would overhear the discussion and name NICKNAME .. the most dynamic as PM professor in madi .. professor puttama
• aadmi mand buddhi ho toh gadhe kehte suna hai .. kabhi gadhe ko gadhe bolte suna hai ?
• aur gadha tas se mas nahi hota // use chee nahi sakte ghar ja nahi sakte ... woh hila toh bhi pareshaani .. GADHA akhir kare toh kare ..
• ONce all the party of POSTdoctoral in madis decided to go to cauvery banks ..on rushipanchami .. somebody declared wearing shoes chappal is not allowed in MADI .. now everybody started their R & D machine ... how to go in scorching sun bear foot ?
• KV hamre mataji ki sari generation KHARI ki KHARI utari .. they made them happy and at the same time LIVED modern lifes to satisfy their husbands .. [ it was a high balancing act ] .. you must meet the ladies who were newly married in 70's
• at one end mother in law is totally obssesed in religion .. on the other hand HUSBAND want extreme modern lifestyle ... CAN you just imagine how that would be ? [ parties movies , welfare associations social service modern dresses presentable language , mangement skills city life ] bac to house .. complete MADI \
• AND major thing NO COMPLAINT entertained
• can yu imagine .. in grahan [eclipse it would be only an hour or two ] if FAther in law insistes he wants to do shradhda ... you will have to soak udid daaal after grahan starts ./ grind it and make wada then within that stipulated time [ all in wet dress ] and serve to the bramhana // funy part would it will not be oupacharik but becomes ful scale meal .. with all twenty memebers of family wantinga heartfull of wadas .. [ TIME shoudl not miss ] and when grahan is at 2 AM what say ?
• well KV welcome to my mothers world !!!! till date no complaints ...
• yes that is too too difficult ...
• and tell me who was the bramhana at shardhda who agreed to eat food cooked by mother [ even though we were in NORTH in govt bunglow ] ... direct lineage of satydhyaan teertharu .....
• SO coming back what is needed in couples to do sadhan together .. THe disparity is always there .. how to SOLVE THEM ? lets see now how readers contribute to solutuon .. what are possible measures that can be taken ? ANY CLUES
• SEEING the grind of previous generation THIS generation has developed some kind of PHOBIA towards tiowards MADI .. insome cases religious fervour iself ?
• shubha ratri
• Ji, just saw this thread. My experience at home is that this is a multiple stage process.
• who is punished by GOD If wife errs ? who is punished if child errs ? who is punished if SHISHYA errs ?
• MEANS HUsband should stop WIfe from erring , FAther should reprimand his child , a GURU should keep his shishya on right pATH .. it is his duty .. failing which he is PUNISHED .... SO grand question is .. WHAT if Like RKG said , mistake se HOROSCOPE nahi match hua and you have a BAD WIFE ..who is not coherent with your ideas .. and LIKE all individuals would not do what she does not believe as USEFUL RIGHT and FULFILLING ..now since horo doesnt match whatever you say is biased view .. and misunderstanding crops ... and more adamancy prevails ... SO in such situation ... a dialogue may not be possible at all ... in some cases BOTH spouses cease to interact or live in a common room .. so communication gap increases .. WHAT TO DO IN SUCH SITUATION ?
• NO adjustment means abatement to the wrong !!! that is a NS thought ...we agree to disagree ....
• NEITHER divorce . separate living is the SOLUTION , MANU clearly prohibits the same ... even if someone commits extreme wrong ... MANU advices to lock up [ in case of adultery ] and keep in malin vastra but says even that wronged one should also be given food and maintained ..even in these extre,me conditions he prohibits violence... but he does not say kill murder or separate or divorce .....
• Now lets look at philosophical view ... YUDHISTHIR says if wife is anukool , then GRUHASTHA ashrama is best way to do sadhana ... ELSE that is hell to live .. ONE must prefer SANYASA
• NOW if we aggregate all the various words of MANU YUDHISTHIR and shastra ... we see that IT IS VERY IMPORTANT that WIFE be In tune .. else one's own sadhana will not TAKE PLACE .... NOW let us revisit RKG view .. AGAR HORO match nahi hua .. aap uttar dakshin ho toh ?
• LET me tell 90 % of people [ madhwa community ] is facing this problem in one way or the other ...
• THe problem is EVERYONE here is [ as usual anyhwhere] is thinking in terms of PHYSICAL solution ... practical solution .. MANUSH solution to the problem .... WHICH does not solve at all
• one must have AMANUSH[ pun indicated ] solution ..
• JOSHi bapu experts ke saamne horo rakhne se aisa problem nahi hota .. RS ek jeeta jagta namuna hai ..
• VAADIRAJARU in his teeka talks about STREE VASHYA ... why a sadhaka requires STREE VASHYA ... ? why MADHWA sidhdhanta tantra is talking about STREE VASHYA ? I asked my guruji
• Ji please share your Guruji's thoughts...
• Guruji laughingly said .. IT is about SVASTREE vashya ... and not PARASTREE .. why svastree vahsya is reqired .. isnt that getting dragged more into samsaaraa ...if stree is not aukool why not just leave and take sanyasa , " I asked "
• aye viju abhi biwi ayee bhi nahi abhi se joruu ka gulaam bannae ka practise karrahe ho .. YEH ACHCHI BAAT NAHI hai
• URUJI said in KALIYUGA ONly PARMAHANSA can take SANYASA .. not all ... if sanyasa were only correct and naybody cold take it .. THE PURANDAR DASARU VIJAYADASARU wold have opted for it .. they were complete VIRAKTA .. SO one needs to do sadhana within samsaara only only ..... SO WIFE being VASHYA is all the more IMPORTANTA so if she is not listening KYA KAREN .. ?
• in general .. varna ashrama dharma .. four ashrama bramhacharya grahastha .. last two is not allowed in KALIYUAGA .... only to ascend PARAMHANSA PEETA one can take sanyasa ...
• SO when RKG style horo NOT matching ...if biwi not maaning .. then one has to resort to tantra .. is openly advised in shastra ... one must subjudicate the woman .. [ there is no free will concept for subordinates in madhwa shastra . ] ... when things dont go your way through normal course then " bend it like ....." the over all advise get the things done .. no matter how ?
• jab ghee sidhi ungli se nahi nikale .. toh .. ghee pighla dena chahiye
• NOW the grand question is DOES these things work ..? [ this question was asked by one of the sudha pandits who would have become PONTIFF but destiny did not give chance ....so even GREATEST SCHOLARS are not confident when it come to application !!!
• lack of limb person was previous mention .. this one is son of great pontiff ...
• NOW another classic NS question that a NS girl might raise .. YOU are a MANIPULATOR .. I am just not me in your presence YOU have killed my individuality //// IS this right on your part .. ? A NS is just NS isk kuch nahi ho sakta
• BUT still she will oblige you ... she knows she is not herself .. PAN apun ko kya ... APNA kaam banata hi na BAAS .. [ but if are slight SOFT type arey iska individuality ka kya .. yeh bhi toh insaan hai .. then tumhara bhi kuch nahi ho sakta // its better both tigether play inky pinky ponky rather than think about SADHANA ]
• IN RAMAYANA .. Madhwa commentators write .. that a man who thinks too much about his woman .. rather is much awed by the woman .. will always be in SHOKA avastha ,...
• SO all above problems that we have discussed comes when a MAN or his family starts giving importance to thoughts of the party in question ....all the people want is THINGS shoudl get right all by itsel ie the party in question shoudl somehow start falling in lINE .. bhai aisa toh sirf filmon me hota hai aur tanta mein
• RS 99% ladkiyan aisi hi hoti hai ... sahi karo toh kehenge TUM KABHI GALAT kyu nahi ho sakte ... agar galto kar rahe ho toh bolenge .. KABHI SAHI karige kuch
• jab aisa comment aya toh samajh lena NS saamne khada hai .. right dekho left dekho ur nikallo .. galti se kaha hai bas yehi ada pe toh humghayal ho gaye .. kya chanchalta hai ... khatm .. life reverse gear mein chalu ..
• One perosn who got job by grace of rayaru after consulting horo and then went to US and became a top vice president in large oragnisation .. MADHWA by birth ... wife too madhwa .but very diferent ... now since this man got everything by rayaru's grace and pooja remedies .. his belief got stronger and he even being in US observes all vrata niyama ... he has to travel every fortnight to australia .. and almost always on ekadashi , hsi questio would be how to do parane in hotel .. NOW as prarbha has it .. MOTHER INLAW ayee .. aur bola jamai babu aise kaise badal gaye .. bhala yeh bhi koi life style hai
• Ramesh Laxmisan " sambhrosh...... " se shatru pagal hojata hai ... agar biwi ko shatru mante ho aur pagal karna hai toh theek hai
• NOW mother inlaw and wife both openly declared to the BOY that they are going to eat NON veg ... tumko jo karna hai karo warna yeh sab chodke seedhe saadhe samsaari bano .. ULTIMATUM
• NOW boy became upset ... and he again sought help ... when asked can he do remedies he said no .. so remote remedies were setup .. I SAID DO YOU HAVE FAITH .. he said YES a you say ...things became normal n due course ...
• ONe of our group member is also facing similar situation a few days back .. he even attempted being recluse ..., BUT then things came back normal ...within days ... SO DO THINS WORK ?
• KV sansaar ki saree madhwa kaho . sabhi ko toh yeh VAYUDEV aisa nahi na karte
• TOH deviyon ab bolo aap logon ko dimaag ki kya jaroorat hai ?
• AISA agar kisi NS se poochlo toh bolengi yaani ab hamein RONe ki bhi permission nahi hai ... [ kuch logon ko bas rone mein hi kuch milta ahai .. DARD sweth hai ]
• Raghvendra magalashtak is best stotra get a right spouse for unmarried and to get spouse right [ if you already have one ] for doing sadhana .... its rayru's promise
• SOmetimes some girls do whatever you want .. and at the end of the day they suddenly realise .."EXCUSE me mujhe aisa kyun lagta hai ki tumne kuch mujhpe KIYA hai mujhse itna ghiswa raho ho .. aur MUJHE gussa nahi araha hai .. I mean Ab araha hai .. nahi araha hai oh I am confused ... I hate YOU "
• and the down part is then achcha bura ka maine fine line distinction khatm hojata hai ... jab sab achcha chal raha hai .. " woh toh HAMARI beti pe jaadu tona kardiya ji .... aur jab baat theek nahi ho toh ... AB hamare bachci ko HOSH agaye hain .. ab tumhara kuch nahi chalne wala ... { RONA TOH ladko ko hi bhaiyya dekhlo ] ... kal tak toh thekk thi ji ,.. [ kya khaak theek thi tumhi ne kuch kardiya higa .. woh toh poehke se hi aise hi thee ..]
• SO this is one way ... mudke expectation wlae raah par nahi chalna chahiye ..
• arey kabhi toh naturally merei baat manlo jaan ...kya hamesha main mantar hi marta phiroon ... jo jeene ka kya fayda ... HEY TUMBHI NS hogaye
• KV ne kahaa " saamne yogya patidev ho toh " KV abhi aap shrimati kv nahi bani .. woh kya kisi bhi shrimati ke dictionary mein YOGYA shabda pATI ke liye hota hi nahi .. [ shaadi ke kuch saalon baad .. dictionary bhi simatke reh jaati hai ... pati naam ka panna khulta hi nahi
• it s all about moving ahead .. giving more importance to sadhana ... and whatever comes in way has to be removed .. how ? ETHICALLY .... YUKTI ..... NOt always times and people will be favourable ...
• nahi toh lucknow se ujjainladka pahunch jayega lekin .. awaaj aur answer ate ho rahenge
• 90 % of tie peope feel using TANTRA is like changing DESTINY ... I say NO .. they say if I am to suffer if ot is writte in my fate then BY doing all these am i not manipualting ... what could be reason of this NS thought ?
• PEOPLE feel by using tantra [ especially when it works ] they feel empowered they think they have done something ... they changed something .. .. this is popular misbelief ... when one uses logic and convices someone he feels he has convinced .. but tantra one feels he has MANIPULATED ... arent convincng and tantra one and same
• and with that what happens .. BIWI sochti hai ki main sudhar gayee ,, aur e din bhiasaab full tanki download karke aye aur ble .. SHUTUP ...tum toh pehle se hi aise hi thi .. woh toh maine mantra mar diya ... " haan haan mai zombie hun .. mera toh koi astitva hi nahi ... an mere achche rehne par bhi tumhe aitraaj hai
• BOTTOM line is never disclose you have used something .. else it itself becomes a problem
• that is why all these is said to be shhhshhh secret ... dekho kahin koi sun na le warna PATI PATNI aur WOH [ MANTRA ] wali baat ho jayegi
• TUMNE toh mujhe vash me rakh hai ... PINJHRE mein kaid hun MAIN ... warna main to dekhun bhi nahi tumahari taraf .. YEH nainsaafi hai
• NS ke hazaaron rup ... kis kis ka varnan karen
• and when one knows ... that husband resorts to all these things .. then revolt also becomes bolder /.. JAO nahi laati chay ..CHAHE toh mantra marlo aur maga LO ... " next moment .. biwi is still lamenting subah subah parehsan karte hain yeh lao woh lao ... and what HUSBAND is colly sipping sipping chaay [ biwi ne unknowingly de bhi diya ] magar use abhibhi lagraha hai ki nahi diya ,,... [ hai na fear files waali baat ]
• neend ke alawaa kuch chaara bhi nahi bachega kyunki tab tak ... SAB WASH hogaya rahega
• viju ke khushhaak jeewan mein aag lagane ka ek hi tareeka hai .. bas shaadi ke baad yeh wala document uski biwi ko dikha dena
• this actually hapoened .. one of my neighbours .. both goit married a two years ago .. before marraige .. both liked each other but felt other might not agree for marraige .. so husband [ from kerala ] went to kerala and got some tantrik .. kriya ... girl [ bengalli ] went to calcutta and got some shakta tantra .. both git married ...
• and after a child's birth ... a year later .. some problem crept in .girl said I knew I DID a mistake .. is houdl not have gone to that lady ... now I am suffering .. he said " oh hello IT was me who went to tantrik " now I am repenting ...both got separated and went to respective tantriks to complain PLEASE REMOVE effect
• still struggling
• wife ko husband ko vash mein nahi karna chahiye ... yeh paap .. balki main kehta hun yeh paap ka baap hai
• some are just woeman .. their woes never end .. and husband say WO eee maa n
• you dont get one by finding .. one must have poorvapunya or get remedies
• seventh lord should be in satvik raghsi in navamsha
• pisecs cancer saagi leo
• lord and seventh lord having sambandh chatushtaya .. lagna lord aspecting fifth house .. porvapunya flows towards wife
• fifth lord and seventh lord
• ek rashi ek nakshaytra /navamsha/varga , mutual exchange mutual aspect
• yuti drishti parivartan ekvarga sambandha chatushtaya
• own navamsha means similar stautus husband
• uchcha is always good